My girlfriend is leaving me cause of my obsession with Africa. Uganda be kidding me, Kenya believe it? Well, it's Ghana be a sad break up...
* * *
I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.
* * *
Apparently, Twilight is "so popular" because teenagers can relate to it. Oh yeah, I remember that time when I was a vampire.
* * *
Being in the friend zone is just like being front row at an awesome fuckin concert.... But you're deaf.
* * *
Blond girl:
"What does idk stand for?"
Me:
"I don't know."
Blonde:
"Oh my God, nobody does!"
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