A brick.
* * *
What's big, white, and will kill you if it falls from a tree?
A fridge.
* * *
What has two legs but can't walk?
A person with two broken legs.
* * *
What did the penguin do in the desert?
It died.
* * *
What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill?
"Here come the elephants over the hill."
* * *
What's red and looks like a bucket?
A red bucket.
* * *
Why can't Jimmy ride a bike?
Jimmy is a goldfish.
* * *
You know what really hurts me inside?
Internal bleeding.
* * *
Knock knock. Who's there?
Doorbell repairman.
* * *
Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
She got hit by a bus.
Knock knock. Who's there?
Not Sally.
* * *
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
* * *
What do you call 5 Mexicans in quicksand?
A dangerous situation that could at any moment turn tragic.
* * *
How do you drown a blonde?
Hold her head under water.
* * *
What has two legs and bleeds a lot?
Half a dog.
* * *
What's funny about 4 black guys going off a cliff in a Cadillac?
Nothing. They were my friends.
* * *
I like my coffee how I like my women.
Without a penis.
* * *
Knock Knock.
Who's there?.
The Nazis.
(The last entry in Anne Frank's Diary)
* * *
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Oh, I didn't know you can yodel!
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