torek, 26. junij 2012

Vicoteka #229

What's red and bad for your teeth?





A brick.


* * *


What's big, white, and will kill you if it falls from a tree?





A fridge.


* * *


What has two legs but can't walk?





A person with two broken legs.


* * *


What did the penguin do in the desert?





It died.



* * *



 What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill?





"Here come the elephants over the hill."


* * *


What's red and looks like a bucket?





A red bucket.


* * *


Why can't Jimmy ride a bike?





Jimmy is a goldfish.


* * *


You know what really hurts me inside?





Internal bleeding.


* * *


Knock knock. Who's there?





Doorbell repairman.


* * *


Why did Sally drop her ice cream?





She got hit by a bus.




Knock knock. Who's there?





Not Sally.


* * *


A dyslexic man walks into a bra.


* * *


What do you call 5 Mexicans in quicksand?





A dangerous situation that could at any moment turn tragic.


* * *


How do you drown a blonde?





Hold her head under water.


* * *


What has two legs and bleeds a lot?





Half a dog.


* * *


What's funny about 4 black guys going off a cliff in a Cadillac?





Nothing. They were my friends.


* * *


I like my coffee how I like my women.





Without a penis.



* * *




Knock Knock.


Who's there?.


The Nazis.


(The last entry in Anne Frank's Diary)




* * *




Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Little old lady.

Little old lady who?

Oh, I didn't know you can yodel!








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